Fear – Your #1 Enemy on Your Perfect Day

As I started to realize that’s writing my own groom wedding speech was much harder than I thought in the very beginning, I almost started to panic. I thought I would not have enough time before my marriage day to prepare for propelling speech. I already saw myself failing.

Why many grooms fail to give a good toast

Then I started to realize that the feeling of fear is only another term of “being unconfident”, and that confidence comes with practice. I gained the impression that grooms who failed giving their groom wedding speeches on their marriage day, were the ones that haven’t prepared and haven’t practiced.

It is interesting that people always think they can do whatever they want within the first attempt. But think about it for new stuff we never did before, the first time is always hard and we most likely won’t reach our goal at the very first try.

Did you succeed in these examples the first attempt?

Remember when you first try to ride a bicycle? Did you just started riding off and everything worked out well? I didn’t. I remember one time blood all over my leg, because I was falling down. Or as you may started to learn how to swim. I tell you my first time I seriously thought I die. Or maybe the first time I tried to hit the basket at basketball. In all these things that I tried to do for the very first time I failed. Well, did I really FAIL? No, not really. I would have failed if I would have given up. But I didn’t. All these things come natural today. Why? Because I did them so many times: In other words I practiced.

The secret to conquer fear and give a great toast

As I realized that and my mind shifted from the idea of failing on my marriage day to practice beforehand, I really calmed down. I understood that if humans do something for first time – it most likely doesn’t turn out perfectly. Excellent results are always a matter of practice. Just like the basketball player has to practice the weeks and months before the great game – you need to practice a little your groom wedding speech before your great day.

Your great speech at your great day

So now you really can relax, because you know you will not feel. All it takes is some practice. You might think: “Well – this is funny: I only wanted to get married once. So how should I practice?”

Be creative how to practice your toast

I guess everyone could come up with their own answer. It’s a matter of what you like. Some people are going to the park, asking some random people they find, giving them their speech. I would never been that tough. I took the easy way, not even with real people. I just took my imagination. Others might take their dog or teddy bear and give them their speech. And that’s all fine. The major thing is that you practice. The more often you practice, the more confident you will become, the less fear you will have.

So look forward to your marriage day, with practice and the next couple of tips coming up, you will be well prepared to give a excellent grooms toast, you really can be proud of.

First Steps to my very own toast

As Beccy and I decided to get married, writing my own groom wedding speech was something I did not really think about. Even though I thought about every word for days, to make sure to create a very romantic, unforgettable moment asking her to marry me.

I realized the importance of giving a good marriage toast

In planning and preparation for the wedding, there was so much to do and so little time that I did not really realize how important this speech would be. Especially not, how challenging this task really was. Obviously, giving your speech is a moment in your life you certainly do not want to mess up.

Imagine everybody who is important to you and your future wife will be there. If you screw up there, you don’t need to mess up any other time in life: People will always remember.

As I realized that, as mentioned on my About page through a grooms speech on a wedding both of us attended. I knew I needed to prepare pretty darn well for this. So I decided to give the best groom wedding speech, I possibly could. But honestly – that made me kind of nervous.

My first attempts to write my own marriage speech

So I sat down and tried to start writing my own speech as I thought I would give it on our marriage day. Hours passed and I did not get any results. So I decided try different creative approaches, but it was not satisfying.

First attempts trying to write my speech - after hours: Just an empty paper

What finally worked for me, writing my own toast

One way that kind of worked for me, was brainstorming different things I wanted to say to the different people. So I took my piece of paper, started writing the names of people I wanted to mention in my speech. Then I created a little mind map of things I wanted to mention for each person. But I crossed most of it out after looking at it a little later.

But still, the best part was Brainstorming my speech. If you want to try it: At this point don’t worry about a certain order, any  jokes or quotes. Just write down, what comes to your mind and let it flow naturally. Simply writing down what comes to your mind will take the pressure off you and you will easily write down your personal ideas.

At this point do not look at any speech examples. Else you will be influenced by what you have read so far. So just let your mind flow, gathering your very own ideas. This is the first step to manage successfully creating your own speech.

Becoming aware of the importance and start some relaxed brainstorming are in my opinion the first important steps to your own unique marriage toast.